Cranky Clam is the surliest mollusc this side of the Atlantic.

He is full of bile and vitriole and he is not afraid to speak his mind! Join the conversation on Twitter!

Cranky Clam doesn't mess around!

Cranky Clam doesn't mess around!



You know, everyone thinks it's so great, being a clam.

Hanging out in the shallow bay, slurping the salty water, living a life of leisure. Well that might be some other fella's cup of tea but this mollusc has better things to do than take a bath all day!

I have goals! Ambitions! Aspirations! I am a clam with dreams!

Cranky clam has ambitions and aspirations

THIS PLACE IS A MESS!


What's that rock doing there.